Thursday, August 24, 2006

Oh, The Places You'll Go! (maybe)

...Wherever you go, you will top all the rest.

Except when you DON'T
Because, sometimes, you WON'T

I'm sorry to say so
but, sadly, it's true
that Bang-ups
and Hang-ups
CAN happen to you.

Dr. Seuss nailed it that time, didn't he??

One of my co-workers became a new grandma 5 days ago. Baby Alexia is beautiful! Pink-cheeked and perfect. I'm so happy for my co-worker. So why am I so sad for me?

Occasionally I give in to the "why me's". As much as I love Ava just the way she is, I can't help but grieve for what she isn't. I have read the literature. I know it's normal to feel this way and to expect it once in awhile. But man, it just seems to blindside me sometimes. I SO wanted my granddaughter to conquer the world! I had this whole scholar/prom-queen/college grad/published author thing all mapped out. Most likely, it's just not going to happen.

I sometimes am just overwhelmed with respect for the other WS families out there who are navigating this crazy maze we call WS. It is no picnic dealing with sick babies and the endless APPOINTMENTS that come with the territory, not to mention that niggling sense that something bad could happen at any time. (Niggling?? Where in the world did that word come from??) Our family is lucky, because Ava had a great-aunt with WS. At least we have some first-hand knowledge to use. Or maybe it is worse this way. We KNOW the bad things that can happen. However you choose to look at it, this is tough stuff!

On a lighter note, Monday Ava has an appointment (yep, another one!)with her ophthalmologist for a followup on her strabismus. For six weeks her eyes have been patched on alternate days--left eye three days, right eye four days. None of us has seen any improvement, so it looks like the next step will be glasses. Can you just see this little tyke with GLASSES??? Too cute!


Lisa R said...

My younger sister just had a baby and although so happy for her i am sad. Molly is already as big as Tate and she is 9 weeeks.

Glasses how cute!!! It is going to be fun picking those out. Can't wait to see them.

Nancy said...

Okay so my eyes WERE dry until I found your blog. You have been a real comfort to me lately and made me feel like my feelings are valid, even when I wasn't Ms. Merry Sunshine 24-7. Thank you for that. The garden is WONDERFUL, and Ava is a doll. I was also struck by Laura having the 2 miscarriages...I did the exact same thing and have a heart-shaped stone out in my garden for them. Not many people know about that, but I just wanted a place to go and think.

You are a wonderful grandma to Ava...and thanks so much for speaking up and letting me know you are thinking of us.


Anonymous said...

Mom This Blog Is Such A Good Blog And I Am So Glad That You Put The Time In Effort In This I Love You


(Your Son)

Anonymous said...

Mom This Blog Is Such A Good Blog And I Am So Glad That You Put The Time In Effort In This I Love You


(Your Son)

Teresa & Shawn said...

Hi Kim,

I just found your blog, and Ava is beautiful. What an incredible smile. I love your blog because it gives me some insight into how my parents and Shawn's parents are feeling about this whole thing. No one really talks about it in my family, but I am sure it is just as tough on the grandparents. Maybe they don't go to the endless doctor's appts. (although it sounds like you do!), but they not only carry all that worry for their grandchild, they carry it for their child as well.